Host: It's time for everyone's favorite game, "Overpaid or Underpaid". I'm your host, Piotr Wiltmas. Let's bring down our first contestant!
(spinning some sort of lottery ball machine)
Host: Will Dan Paulmeyer please come down?
(crowd goes wild and roses are thrown at his feet)
Host: Ok here are the rules of the game, it's simple. We will describe a player for you and you will either say overpaid or underpaid. Simple enough? Let's get started. Are you ready?
Dan: Excited to be here, bring on the players
Host: Our first player is 28-year-old center back Bakary Soumare. He is on his second stint with the Fire and has been partnering Jhon Kennedy Hurtado in the center of defense for the Men in Red. He makes $370,000. What is your verdict?
Dan: Oh, this is an easy one! I had high hopes for Soumare and still had fond memories of his first stint with the Fire but this time he has not been the same player. He has struggled early on and been at fault for some of the set piece problems. He is the second-highest paid player on the Fire but isn't playing like it so I'm going with OVERPAID.
Host: Wow, that's a shocker. Ok, next player is new addition Greg Cochrane.
Dan: Another easy one, Cochrane came in a trade from the Galaxy and was supposed to be a back up left back - but with Segares hurt, he has quickly established himself as a respectable left back. So far he has been the surprise of the sea on for me and at $48,500, Cochrane is UNDERPAID.
Host: If Cochrane is underpaid, what about Segares?
Dan: Well, Segares makes $173,333 and that is not an outrageous figure. When you see the productivity from Cochrane though, Segares doesn't seem like a necessity but more like a luxury. With a tight cap situation, he is OVERPAID.
Host: Another shocker! The Fire faithful might not agree with you on that one. Ok, let's move on to Dilly Duka?
Dan: This is a tough one Mr. Wiltmas. I think he has the potential and shows some flashes of it. He hasn't been very consistent and at $190,000, we need consistency so Dilly is OVERPAID.
Host: Back to back overpaids! This is drama people! What's your thoughts on Quincy at $60,000?
Dan: Oh, c'mon, this is too easy. He is UNDERPAID. Quincy has been another surprise this year and has partnered well with Magee up top. He has 3 goals and an assist already. I believe he can continue this form all year.
Host: You're right, that was too easy. Let's make this a little harder. How about Patrick Ianni?
Dan: What's he make?
Dan: Ianni seems to be stuck at the third centerback role for the Fire. He is a great reserve option but with the small cap, that is too much to pay a player on the bench. Patrick Ianni is OVERPAID.
(crowd member throws a tomato at Dan)
Host: The crowd does not agree with that one. Let's give you another easy one. How about young Benji Joya at $53,000?
Dan: In his limited time, Joya has really impressed me. I don't expect him to light the league on fire in his first year. Joya is just 20 years old and a talented kid. He is good value for the role he plays now and when considering what he can become, Benji is definitely UNDERPAID.
Host: Can't argue with that one. Ok, last one, let's go to crowd.
Crowd Member: What are your thoughts on Juan Luis Anangono who makes $175,000?
Dan: I'm really stuck on this one. On one hand, he has had some nice moments and is a physical imposing figure. He is stuck at the third forward position and does have some flat games. He hasn't produced like we thought he would and in our cap situation, Anangono is OVERPAID.
Host: There you have it folks. This has been another round of "Overpaid or Underpaid". Any last comments Dan?
Dan: First I would like to tell my mom "hello" and that I would like to share all of the salary information with the crowd.
When I made my decisions, I took a few things in to account. First, the cap is tight here in Chicago and then I considered what the other players at the position are paid. I also took into account what our expectations for these players are. I'm open to here the crowd's comments though so please feel free to debate with me.
Host: That's all we have time for! Thank you for joining us. Until next time...