"Marry/F**k/Kill" is a game of the Internet age, and the rules are simple: name a group of three people ("Iron Man and Thor and Captain America," "Blanche, Rose or Dorothy"), and ask the crowd to choose one fate for each of them - one to partner with for good, one explored for a connection but not kept, and one cast off into the outer darkness. Fans of the dearly-departed sitcom 30 Rock will recognize this game in its safe-for-primetime version, Marry/Boff/Kill, which name we're borrowing because this is SB Nation, and there's, like, kids in here, maaaaaaan.
Here at Hot Time, we're going to use the game to talk about players - specifically Chicago Fire players. We're going to use it as a way to talk about the roster, player by player, in terms of their performance, contract details*, and potential going forward. And we'll do it all with an eye toward 2016 and beyond.
It works like this:
- ‘Marry' indicates a desire to keep the player at their current number or sometimes a bit more;
- ‘Boff' (i.e., ‘F**k) means that we're, uhh, f**king the player over, asking for modifications to their contract or running them through the Re-Entry Draft process - we're interested, but not on these terms; and
- ‘Kill' means we're not even interesting in hooking up - a 'nope.' If under contract for 2016, we'd prefer terminating the player's contact with CF97.
2015 stats: 6 appearances, 5 starts, 519 minutes.
24-year-old defender. $70,000 base, $77,833 guaranteed.
The Case for 'Marry:' Daneil Cyrus was a late-season addition to a Fire team that was 1.) Already buried at the foot of the table, and 2.) Coming apart at the seams defensively. Then we put the 6-foot-4 guy on the right flank, just for yuks, as one does. Once he switched back to the center, he didn't look magnificent, but he had his moments, which at that price tag is probably more than we should expect in the circumstances.
The Case for 'Boff:' GAMEPLAY ALTERATION CLAXON! Since Cyrus is/was on loan, there's very little chance of a different sort of deal for him. It's either we keep him, or we send him back to W Connection. This round, no boffing. ... sorry.
The Case for 'Kill:' Cyrus was on the field for some of the most clown-car defending of the season, including but not limited to the abject 4-0 surrender to DC United. He's getting call-ups to T&T in a World Cup qualifying year, meaning constant availability issues.
Have your say, Fire family: Daneil Cyrus: Marry?
Boff? or Kill?
*Please note that we are taking the MLSPU salary information at face value in this exercise. It's common knowledge that the information isn't 100 percent correct, yes. If someone from the front office would like to provide us with superior data, we would be deeply appreciative.